How much do words matter?

I take the philosophy that Lenny Bruce had about words, which is basically that words tend to for the most part carry the meaning we individually give them, and they then gain power that we give them. You can't be offended by someone's words unless you choose to take offense. You can't be persuaded by someone's words unless you choose to be swayed. Words can't anger you unless you choose to react violently to those words. So while words may be given to convey a certain meaning, it is what one decides to take from those words that really matters. I consider the manner in which someone chooses to react to words to say something about that person. And you are then incorrect in your essment of mere words starting anything. It is how people chose to react to the words which started anything.